Season 1 was the introduction of Horrors of the Icebox. Things were pretty shaky at first, and often we'd be scrambling at the last minute to even pick what would be reviewed the next week. Originally the first two reviews were the only ones planned. Nobody had any idea that it would become a reoccurring feature on the site.
Michelina's Zap'ems Taco Bites - 11-29-2008
Tasty Tex-Mex food, or good use for leftover dogfood?
Swanson Stuffing Baked Turkey - 12-14-2008
Some creatures from the Monster Manual do exist in real life.
Swanson Hungry-Man's Beer Battered Chicken and Cheese Fries - 01-17-2009
My God, it's full of grease.
Stouffer's Bistro Barbecue Chicken & Bacon Panini - 01-30-2009
Toast? From a microwave? You sir are mad!
No-Name Salisbury Steak Dinner - 02-20-2009
Jordan examines the greatest invention of the insane Dr. Salisbury.
WeightWatcher's Smart Ones Double Fudge Cake - 03-05-2009
As a celebration of Frozen Food Day, I binge on frozen diet cakes.
Aunt Jemima Griddlecake Sandwiches - 04-18-2009
After a short break, I'm forced to continue making reviews.
After the first six reviews, a fake kidnapping was planned. Jordan would be taken away and forced to review more frozen dinners against his will. There is a kernel of truth to this: Jordan had grown really tired of doing the reviews and wanted to try something different. In retrospect, this was probably one of the worst ways to do it. It was foreshadowed in the March '09 Mailbag article and from May through September of 2009, Jordan was effectively 'kidnapped'. A fake site administrator named Rast posted site updates, and administrated the forums, while these articles came in regularly. The kidnapper had a fake email address set up and everything. It was all very elaborate.
The problem was that early on, the site didn't get a huge amount of traffic, so many people didn't know or care what was going on. The big event that was planned fizzled from the start and a contest that was being developed got cut. Live and learn.
Stouffer's Large Portion Meatloaf - 05-01-2009
Jordan would do anything for love, but he won't do that.
Michelina's Zap'ems Three Cheese Pizza - 05-28-2009
Jordan's puns get too cheesy and he goes out of his whey to make them bad.
Swanson Hungry-Man Backyard Barbeque - 06-24-2009
Jordan is forced to try another Hungry-Man meal and predictably dislikes the experience.
No Name Chicken Nugget Dinner - 07-24-2009
Jordan decides he hasn't gotten quite enough vinegar in his diet.
Meal, Ready-to-Eat - 08-21-2009
Jordan gets his dirty hands on an MRE and has his own private mess.
President's Choice General Tao Chicken - 09-17-2009
Chinese food and sweet sweet freedom.
After the confusion of Season 2, the next set of reviews went back to the basics. Reviews were done without any pretense of storyline, and all was good with the world. The name of this season also alludes to the fact that of the seven reviews (six plus the Frozen Food Day Special), five of them are reviews of a single product. Most reviews in the past dealt with a meal that had 3-5 components each. These were reviews of meals that had one component, but there would be 2-3 different meals reviewed at a time.
Swanson Hungry-Man's Sports Grill Jumbo Popcorn Chicken and Pizza Sticks - 10-16-2009
Jordan muses over sauces and invents new words while finally completing a long-awaited review.
Aunt Jemima's Scrambled Eggs and Bacon - 11-12-2009
Jordan has bacon and eggs and then hangs himself.
President's Choice Smokin' Stampede Pulled Pork Quesadillas - 12-11-2009
Jordan makes implied masturbation jokes and tries out a free meal.
President's Choice Chipotle Chicken and Gaujillo Vegetable Bean Quesadillas - 01-08-2010
Two more free quesadillas round out the entire collection.
Better Food Wrap 'N Go Bean Burrito Extravaganza - 02-05-2010
Three burritos...bought from a hardware store!
Cravings Low-Fat Cheesecakes - 03-04-2010
Keylime, cherry and chocolate cheesecakes to celebrate National Frozen Food Day!
Parker Lee Spicy Hot Beef Noodle Bowl - 05-28-2010
How spicy does Parker Lee mean when they say spicy?
The newest season of Horrors of the Ice Box is dealing exclusively with "healthy" frozen dinners. We had reviewed some healthy options before (both as Frozen Food Day Specials), but never an actual meal. This season is on-going.
Healthy Choice Gourmet Steamers Cajun Chicken & Shrimp - 07-22-2010
Jordan tackles a low-fat option and his nemesis - the shrimp.
President's Choice Blue Menu Roast Turkey with Vegetables - 08-20-2010
Back to basics with a low-fat turkey dinner.